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Posted by Lisa Lewis Koster - - 11 comments

Today I'm linking up with Chrysalis for Marriage Monday.  This week's topic is romance. 

What comes to mind when you think of romance?  For me the word brings a picture of a tall, dark, handsome man seated on a white horse with wind-blown hair, ready to come to my aid.  (Sounds like the cover of a romance novel, doesn't it?)


Closing in on twenty years of marriage, my definition of romance has evolved greatly from the expectations I had as a newlywed.  I'm certainly not opposed to candy and flowers, but superficial gifts such as these don't move me like acts of thoughtfulness do.

  • Opening the door for me
  • Carrying my burdens (physically and emotionally)
  • Stepping in when I'm worn out
  • Making me a priority (such as cancelling his plans when I need his help)
  • Coming to my defense

I think to be romanced is to feel loved.  More and more, I find myself spelling "love" H-E-L-P. 

Mutual Respect

We make time to spend time together, even if it's just a run to the Home Depot!  Bob's been to the fabric store with me; I've gone to the (world's longest!) tractor show with him.  Just recently we tacked a trip to Frederik Meijer Gardens on to Bob's dentist appointment that was up in that area.

Bob is tall, his hair used to be dark, and in my eyes he will always be handsome.  I even saw him seated on a horse once, though it wasn't white.  While I feel loved and cherished by Bob, I can't expect him to be my everything.  That's the job of my One True Love, who one day will come riding a white horse.

"I saw heaven standing open and there before me was a white horse, whose rider is called Faithful and True. With justice he judges and makes war. His eyes are like blazing fire, and on his head are many crowns. He has a name written on him that no one knows but he himself." ~ Revelation 19:11-12

Jesus, thank you for a husband who shows me he loves me on a regular basis.  Help me focus on who he is rather than who he is not, remembering that ultimately You are the one I need to rely on.


11 Responses so far.

  1. Great post, Lisa! Very encouraging words for those who are married and will be married in the future. Blessings! Kathy

  2. Anonymous says:

    I like this a lot. There is a definite difference between love and romance. Although romance is nice, love is what matters in all those little daily situations. Human love can fade, the the love of God is everlasting.

  3. Denise says:

    I love this, very inspiring.

  4. I completely relate to your definition of love as being help. I think my main love language is "acts of service" and anytime my husband steps in for me, I just fall more in love with him. Thank you!


  5. Constance says:

    I agree, God is the One True Romancer of our souls! likewise my husband's hair is graying (what little is left) and he's growing older but he is MINE and that's what matters. He is just as handsome in my eyes and actually even more so than when we met. He has changed and matured into a wonderful Godly man and who couldn't be attracted to that?! You are wise in respecting one another and making each other a priority...it is no wonder God has blessed your marriage! Thanks for your insights!

  6. Faith says:

    Oh I LOVED this post....my favorite one so far! LOVE what you say about our earthly husbands not being our everything. You are soooo right that it needs to be JESUS!!! cannot wait to see Him on that white horse riding!! :) blessings to you and thanks for your nice comments on my blog! enjoy the week.....

  7. Tami says:

    I love your use of Revelation 19:11-12 in this post. So appropriate. I love the reminder to look for your everything from your One True Love. Thanks.

  8. Oh I really liked when you described your man, I feel the same way when I look at my man and know I will think him only cuter when he is a sweet old fellow :)

  9. Susannah says:

    Amen... loved this: "I think to be romanced is to feel loved. More and more, I find myself spelling 'love' H-E-L-P."

    Contratulations on twenty years together. Well done.

    I enjoyed your post! Thanks for joining us for Marriage Monday today, Lisa.

    Blessings, e-Mom @ Chrysalis ღ

  10. Loved this. True love is h-e-l-p. So true.

  11. Tammy says:

    Excellent post, love it!

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